Think of this as a Missed Connection.

You blew the red light east bound on Lawrence at Damen at 5:26 pm this evening.

 

There was enough time for the biker in front of me to make it half way into the intersection, northbound on Damen, before you came whizzing past my front wheel.

 

I yelled "You're an idiot!" at your big haired chick, self, and you looked back at me. I meant it!

 

I woulda testified for any of the cars, that managed to not kill you, if they had.

 

Keep riding like a tard!

love,

gabe

 

Witness bad behavior during your commute? Feel free to post. Maybe that lovely human can read it and think they are famous. Maybe you can also inspire the whole generation of kids to shower but we can start with small things.

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Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by curt(is) locke on September 19, 2014 at 4:35am

No, your "missed connection" doesn't read as "I am morally AND physically superior" at all....

Chitown_Mike said:

You:  The older gentleman who doesn't like to stop for red lights at very busy intersections, move at a snail's pace, and like to shoal. 

Me:  The guy who stops and waits with traffic, big orange Seal Line backpack, WEARING a helmet, and way faster of a rider than you.

We meet again, but the morning this time.

YES, if you try to shoal me I will hold my line whether or not that puts YOU in a dangerous situation with traffic.  If you want to pass, open your useless flapper and say something, I left my crystal ball mount on my other bike and can't read your mind.  Don't get lippy because you waited 15 feet behind me and started rolling on the yellow to try to pass while I waited and went on green and still stayed in front of you.

I'll be out here everyday, rain or shine.

Permalink Reply by Matt Talbert on September 19, 2014 at 4:46am

I will never wrap my head around shoaling, and how some people are so dense that they never get the point.

Chitown_Mike said:

You:  The older gentleman who doesn't like to stop for red lights at very busy intersections, move at a snail's pace, and like to shoal. 

Me:  The guy who stops and waits with traffic, big orange Seal Line backpack, WEARING a helmet, and way faster of a rider than you.

We meet again, but the morning this time.

YES, if you try to shoal me I will hold my line whether or not that puts YOU in a dangerous situation with traffic.  If you want to pass, open your useless flapper and say something, I left my crystal ball mount on my other bike and can't read your mind.  Don't get lippy because you waited 15 feet behind me and started rolling on the yellow to try to pass while I waited and went on green and still stayed in front of you.

I'll be out here everyday, rain or shine.

Permalink Reply by Chris LaFrombois (8.5 mi - o.w.) on September 19, 2014 at 5:56am

You're right. I've given up calling people on it. There is no other line you would get into and automatically think you need to be at the front. And generally, the shoaler (like in Chitown_Mike's story) is going way slower than they think they are and a few riders always pass them. And then the cycle (pun!) repeats at the next light.

Matt Talbert said:

I will never wrap my head around shoaling, and how some people are so dense that they never get the point.

Chitown_Mike said:

You:  The older gentleman who doesn't like to stop for red lights at very busy intersections, move at a snail's pace, and like to shoal. 

Me:  The guy who stops and waits with traffic, big orange Seal Line backpack, WEARING a helmet, and way faster of a rider than you.

We meet again, but the morning this time.

YES, if you try to shoal me I will hold my line whether or not that puts YOU in a dangerous situation with traffic.  If you want to pass, open your useless flapper and say something, I left my crystal ball mount on my other bike and can't read your mind.  Don't get lippy because you waited 15 feet behind me and started rolling on the yellow to try to pass while I waited and went on green and still stayed in front of you.

I'll be out here everyday, rain or shine.

Permalink Reply by Chitown_Mike on September 19, 2014 at 7:25am

Salty much chicken legs?

Were you the unsuccessful shoaler this yesterday morning and didn't like the outcome?



curt(is) locke said:

No, your "missed connection" doesn't read as "I am morally AND physically superior" at all....

Chitown_Mike said:

You:  The older gentleman who doesn't like to stop for red lights at very busy intersections, move at a snail's pace, and like to shoal. 

Me:  The guy who stops and waits with traffic, big orange Seal Line backpack, WEARING a helmet, and way faster of a rider than you.

We meet again, but the morning this time.

YES, if you try to shoal me I will hold my line whether or not that puts YOU in a dangerous situation with traffic.  If you want to pass, open your useless flapper and say something, I left my crystal ball mount on my other bike and can't read your mind.  Don't get lippy because you waited 15 feet behind me and started rolling on the yellow to try to pass while I waited and went on green and still stayed in front of you.

I'll be out here everyday, rain or shine.

Permalink Reply by Chitown_Mike on September 19, 2014 at 7:27am

I gave up as well, I just hold my line and let them dance around me, just like riders who salmon.  This same rider did this a could of weeks ago so I knew what to expect, I just didn't think he would wait and try to rush the light like he did.

Chris LaFrombois (8.5 mi - o.w.) said:

You're right. I've given up calling people on it. There is no other line you would get into and automatically think you need to be at the front. And generally, the shoaler (like in Chitown_Mike's story) is going way slower than they think they are and a few riders always pass them. And then the cycle (pun!) repeats at the next light.

Matt Talbert said:

I will never wrap my head around shoaling, and how some people are so dense that they never get the point.

Chitown_Mike said:

You:  The older gentleman who doesn't like to stop for red lights at very busy intersections, move at a snail's pace, and like to shoal. 

Me:  The guy who stops and waits with traffic, big orange Seal Line backpack, WEARING a helmet, and way faster of a rider than you.

We meet again, but the morning this time.

YES, if you try to shoal me I will hold my line whether or not that puts YOU in a dangerous situation with traffic.  If you want to pass, open your useless flapper and say something, I left my crystal ball mount on my other bike and can't read your mind.  Don't get lippy because you waited 15 feet behind me and started rolling on the yellow to try to pass while I waited and went on green and still stayed in front of you.

I'll be out here everyday, rain or shine.

Permalink Reply by David Barish on September 20, 2014 at 12:10pm
I was on Clark at Irving and starting to slow down as I was going to the ball game. You were behind me on a fixie. I thought I would be courteous and wave you by. For some reason you annoyed thinking I was telling you what to do. I saw your exasperation and tried to explain by the time we got to Grace. You were having none of it. I hope you had a better day after our encounter. I did.
Permalink Reply by Anne Alt on September 21, 2014 at 9:34am

To the slow guy on the antique folding bike in the Dearborn bike lane - I'm slow because I'm recovering from an injury, so right now nearly everyone is passing me. I'm okay with that. But you're so slow that even I needed to pass you. Your persistent shoaling at every single intersection got old really fast, especially to people who were much faster than me. You were getting stuck at every single light even when shoaling. Why not hang back, relax and stop annoying people?

Permalink Reply by Chitown_Mike on September 22, 2014 at 3:52am

There needs to be a "Shoalers gunna shoal" meme.....

Anne Alt said:

To the slow guy on the antique folding bike in the Dearborn bike lane - I'm slow because I'm recovering from an injury, so right now nearly everyone is passing me. I'm okay with that. But you're so slow that even I needed to pass you. Your persistent shoaling at every single intersection got old really fast, especially to people who were much faster than me. You were getting stuck at every single light even when shoaling. Why not hang back, relax and stop annoying people?

Permalink Reply by Jordan Snow on September 22, 2014 at 5:57am

SCENE: Friday evening around 9:15p.

ME: Stopped on my bike in the far right lane of NB Damen at Montrose, waiting for the red light to turn green.

PEDESTRIAN: Walking W on the S side of Montrose, crossing legally as the pedestrian timer clicked down from around 9 or 10. 

YOU: Jimmy Johns delivery driver riding quickly up behind us on NB Damen, deciding to overtake all vehicles (myself and two cars) in the turning lane to turn right (EB) onto Montrose before the light turns green. 

First off, what the hell are you doing? You could have easily slowed down and fit between me and the car to make your right turn. Instead, YOU came skidding to a stop when the pedestrian came into view and, thankfully, only glanced him because of his reaction time and yours. When I yelled, "Hey it's a red light man!" you replied, "Well maybe he should look both ways!" to which I replied "Maybe you should look at the f***ing red light!" 

A real productive conversation had by all. In hindsight I probably could have trailed him, further excoriating him for his lack of care or humility. Instead I figured I'd just post it passive-aggressively on this site in hopes that the sandwich monger reads the pulps in between reckless delivery rides. 

Permalink Reply by curt(is) locke on September 22, 2014 at 6:53am

Yes, you should have continued "excoriating" the freaky fast sandwich delivery cyclist.  That usually works.

Jordan Snow said:

SCENE: Friday evening around 9:15p.

ME: Stopped on my bike in the far right lane of NB Damen at Montrose, waiting for the red light to turn green.

PEDESTRIAN: Walking W on the S side of Montrose, crossing legally as the pedestrian timer clicked down from around 9 or 10. 

YOU: Jimmy Johns delivery driver riding quickly up behind us on NB Damen, deciding to overtake all vehicles (myself and two cars) in the turning lane to turn right (EB) onto Montrose before the light turns green. 

First off, what the hell are you doing? You could have easily slowed down and fit between me and the car to make your right turn. Instead, YOU came skidding to a stop when the pedestrian came into view and, thankfully, only glanced him because of his reaction time and yours. When I yelled, "Hey it's a red light man!" you replied, "Well maybe he should look both ways!" to which I replied "Maybe you should look at the f***ing red light!" 

A real productive conversation had by all. In hindsight I probably could have trailed him, further excoriating him for his lack of care or humility. Instead I figured I'd just post it passive-aggressively on this site in hopes that the sandwich monger reads the pulps in between reckless delivery rides. 

Permalink Reply by curt(is) locke on September 22, 2014 at 7:41am

Who, ME?? 

"Salty much chicken legs?" Me speak pretty one day -- what's your native tongue?

As to whether I was the "shoaler" suspect, I don't think so.  (I ride mostly on the south side.)  I may qualify as being an "older gentleman" (53), but there's not too many cyclists out on the streets that are demonstratively "way" faster than me.  I mean, sure, there's a few roadies in full gear that blow me clean away while I am pushing my mountain bike, but I like to think that I can still hold my own with the pack. 

And as for "chicken legs", while not nearly as powerful as 20 years ago when I was in my bike messenger prime, my legs aren't to be confused with those that are breaded, salt & peppered, and come with hot or mild sauce (on the side) at your local Harold's.

Still spinning,

Curt(is)

Chitown_Mike said:

Salty much chicken legs?

Were you the unsuccessful shoaler this yesterday morning and didn't like the outcome?



curt(is) locke said:

No, your "missed connection" doesn't read as "I am morally AND physically superior" at all....

Chitown_Mike said:

You:  The older gentleman who doesn't like to stop for red lights at very busy intersections, move at a snail's pace, and like to shoal. 

Me:  The guy who stops and waits with traffic, big orange Seal Line backpack, WEARING a helmet, and way faster of a rider than you.

We meet again, but the morning this time.

YES, if you try to shoal me I will hold my line whether or not that puts YOU in a dangerous situation with traffic.  If you want to pass, open your useless flapper and say something, I left my crystal ball mount on my other bike and can't read your mind.  Don't get lippy because you waited 15 feet behind me and started rolling on the yellow to try to pass while I waited and went on green and still stayed in front of you.

I'll be out here everyday, rain or shine.

Permalink Reply by Chitown_Mike on September 22, 2014 at 8:55am

You internet trolls make me laugh; little quip or dig here and the world halts when called out on it.  I don't care for your narrative and "back in my day" reflections, the gentleman I brought into question has previously proven to me on numerous occasions to be a slower rider.  No judgement against his self-worth or moral nature, nor a boost to mine.  If he was a stronger rider, then go right ahead and pass me, but he isn't (sadly or otherwise); I just want to get home safely and not have to worry about dodging potholes and slower (not of less value) riders.  One is not indicative of the other, perhaps your inference of my previous experience as stated is lost upon your understanding of the English language.

My native language forgot a comma and some other arbitrary English language law of the land, whoops!



curt(is) locke said:

Who, ME?? 

"Salty much chicken legs?" Me speak pretty one day -- what's your native tongue?

As to whether I was the "shoaler" suspect, I don't think so.  (I ride mostly on the south side.)  I may qualify as being an "older gentleman" (53), but there's not too many cyclists out on the streets that are demonstratively "way" faster than me.  I mean, sure, there's a few roadies in full gear that blow me clean away while I am pushing my mountain bike, but I like to think that I can still hold my own with the pack. 

And as for "chicken legs", while not nearly as powerful as 20 years ago when I was in my bike messenger prime, my legs aren't to be confused with those that are breaded, salt & peppered, and come with hot or mild sauce (on the side) at your local Harold's.

Still spinning,

Curt(is)

Chitown_Mike said:

Salty much chicken legs?

Were you the unsuccessful shoaler this yesterday morning and didn't like the outcome?



curt(is) locke said:

No, your "missed connection" doesn't read as "I am morally AND physically superior" at all....

Chitown_Mike said:

You:  The older gentleman who doesn't like to stop for red lights at very busy intersections, move at a snail's pace, and like to shoal. 

Me:  The guy who stops and waits with traffic, big orange Seal Line backpack, WEARING a helmet, and way faster of a rider than you.

We meet again, but the morning this time.

YES, if you try to shoal me I will hold my line whether or not that puts YOU in a dangerous situation with traffic.  If you want to pass, open your useless flapper and say something, I left my crystal ball mount on my other bike and can't read your mind.  Don't get lippy because you waited 15 feet behind me and started rolling on the yellow to try to pass while I waited and went on green and still stayed in front of you.

I'll be out here everyday, rain or shine.

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