Specifically what behaviors do you feel subjected to, especially those of other cyclists, that annoy/irritate/frighten you that you feel you disproportionately experience as a direct result of your gender identity.

I am exploring this as a possible topic for an upcoming video education piece. So hit me.

Feel free to send me your thoughts in an email (jason@activetrans.org) if you don't feel like sharing with the group.

Thanks all!

Jason Jenkins

Education Specialist

Active Trans

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Well said.  I've seen situations like the one Jennifer described, or where women are hit on or treated like they understand nothing about bikes.  We're better off when sales people or mechanics don't make assumptions based on gender.  I like it so much better when they ask questions to determine the customer's needs and level of knowledge rather than relying on any stereotype.  

In a bike world where some men don't know how to change a tire and some women are kick-ass mechanics, stereotypes should not be part of the picture.  We each have our own set of knowledge, skills and needs. 

notoriousDUG said:

I have seen mechanics treat women very differently than they do men; sometimes in a 'positive' manner (heaping attention on them just because they are women is not necessarily a good thing) and sometimes in a negative manner.

Regardless of gender shops should work hard to make all people, of all skill levels feel welcome and comfortable asking even the most basic questions.  If the shop you go to is not doing that go to another shop.

Agreed. I was riding today when I passed a guy on a heavy looking mountain bike. Dude then proceeds to shoal me at the next 2 lights. I finally got so frustrated when he ran through the light at belmont & western that when the light turned green, I went as fast as I could. No way do I want to daudle behind someone at that intersection or while going over the bridge!



Jenny T said:

I hate getting passed (read: shoaled) at red lights by guys who think they're faster than me.  I'm sure it's not always just because I'm female, but I think some make the assumption that female = slow.  Obviously they do not see my calves of steel.

would it bother you as much if it was another woman who did the shoaling?

I mean, shoaling sucks either way.
Having said that, I've had numerous weird shoaling encounters with men (including one who kept winking at me and eyeing me up and down every time I had to pass) and none with women. I wonder if this will change with time though.

Michael A said:

would it bother you as much if it was another woman who did the shoaling?

As a transwoman, I get shoaled by cis/trans men AND cis/trans women, and it has nothing to do with with zem thinking I'm slower than zem, and everything to do with zem thinking that getting a 5' drop at the intersection will somehow get zer 10 mph selves home faster.

At first I didn't think there was anything gender specific.  Cat calls happen whether you're on a bike or not... and the getting passed by people who think they're faster?  Women do that too.  But, the latter is probably the only thing that bothers me.  Although women do the shoaling as well, I do notice men being a little more aggressive about it.  It kind of makes me laugh though, watching them struggle to stay ahead of me for a couple of blocks after they've passed me.  They eventually give up.

I agree that catcalls happen everywhere, so getting comments or being leered at while on a bike is not out of the ordinary. I remember a particularly fun example years ago where some guy said he'd like to "sniff [your] seat," ugh. I have also experienced the shoaling issue, and a few weeks ago some guy rolled up and stopped right next to me, like a foot away, when there was no need to be so close--really in my space, another aggressive behavior women experience in many contexts.

Since this thread has substantially been centered around issues of class-based privilege, I decided it was worth sharing this post, which I found very enlightening; it put into words just why I had long been anbivalent about the whole idea of 'privilege,' or at least its description as such:

http://itself.wordpress.com/2013/08/10/privilege-and-the-rhetoric-o...

This was the follow-on post:

http://itself.wordpress.com/2013/08/13/privilege-and-white-dudes/

I've never heard of "ze" and "zer" and by gut instinct is this is a good idea. I will google it later. I do want to say though, as someone who cares about grammar, THANK YOU for not promoting the use of "they" and "their" as ways of referring to individuals.

envane (69 furlongs) said:

It is NOT OK to use "transgender", "transsexual", "genderqueer", or "nonbinary" as a noun or verb without permission.  Its is NOT OK to use gendered pronouns,  (#triggerwarning "he","she") until you know for sure what the person's gender indentity is.  Instead use "ze/zer"  It is OK to ask what gender a person identifies as, but it is NOT OK to ask about zers genitals (none of your business and completely irrelevant, cis-bigot).

 

Do you think the term "mansplaining" contains a micro-aggression? (Not trying to imply that it does, I'm just trying to learn.)

echo said:

Even if I didn't know a single thing, it's the assumption that I didn't. It's explaining without asking if I want things explained to me. Mansplaining. 

I've seen variants on this behavior in both men and women - different tones and nuances. 

Tom Dworzanski said:

Do you think the term "mansplaining" contains a micro-aggression? (Not trying to imply that it does, I'm just trying to learn.)

echo said:

Even if I didn't know a single thing, it's the assumption that I didn't. It's explaining without asking if I want things explained to me. Mansplaining. 

I generally agree with everything you've said Peenworm, but in this post I respectfully disagree. The women here are absolutely right that men need to listen more to understand and I've said that already. And as has been proven by the other women in this thread, men patronize and disrespect women based on their gender very commonly. It's wrong and I don't condone it. However, as men often overemphasize women's traditionally feminine traits, women often overemphasize men's traditionally masculine traits. I think your wording may have done just that.

When you talk about "honor" (which is defined as "high respect") in a dismissive way it is very destructive to a man's emotions because to men concepts like honor and respect are the pinnacle of emotional happiness, much as being loved might be to a woman (from what I've heard and read endlessly, though I don't admit to being able to personally know this.)

I don't mean to attack what you said because it certainly doesn't seem like it was your intention for it to be taken negatively (in fact it seems like you were trying to help and I think that's awesome), but I do think it's important to communicate that as men, ideas like honor are of extreme importance (whether we show it or not) and shouldn't be used so casually.

Links from the first page of Google results for "importance of respect men":

http://boards.askmen.com/showthread.php?129226-Men-how-important-is...

http://loveandrespect.com/about-us/

http://thealbanyjournal.com/2010/10/men-want-respect/

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/freedom-learn/201208/in-relatio...


Peenworm "8 mile" Grubologist said:

Well the thing is, they kinda don't work both ways. If you really want to try and understand that the best you can, as a man, the thing to do when checked on this is not get all defensive over your honor, but stop and listen for a bit because there's a whole shitload of stuff that we never have to think about. 

Davo said:

Yes I would not want to believe that the experience was solely about gender, perhaps the mechanic was just a jerk. But after further elaboration, it is known that she felt the mechanics conduct was based of her gender and I can try to understand that the best I can as a man. 

I'd like to add that microagressions work both ways. There is no way that I can reiterate myself that wont get thrown back in my face as implying that i am a complete sexist. It sucks that people are subject to subconscious and conscious beratement (for lack of a better word).

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