A Few Fun Facts from My Commute Tonight: Skirtsplaining & A Near-Dooring That Ended in a Flip-Flop Shaming

So the worst part about the driver tonight that opened their door so fast that I had to swerve on my bike into traffic to avoid getting hit by one inch, totally convinced even as I swerved barely out of thee ways that I was going to flip over my handlebars, was when the woman who did it MOCKED the noise I made after it happened, mimicking my scream of surprise and fear that I cried in her direction while she was getting out of her car.

The second worst part was when I tried to explain what she did was illegal and that I was going to take her information and report her - despite the fact that she didn't MEAN to, that she didn't ACTUALLY hit me - was when she cussed me out and called me white trash.

But the best part was the biker dude who was 100 feet away and saw it all happen, who yelled at her about how she almost killed me, demanding, "Do you even know anything about bicycle safety?" responded to her white trash comment. "She's white trash? She looks great! You're the one wearing sweatpants and flip-flops!"

The moral of the story is always look out of your window and mirrors before you open your door no matter where you are. Opening your door into traffic without looking is still breaking the law, especially when it recklessly endangers a cyclist. Even when you're lucky and DON'T kill them, even when you didn't mean to.

The second moral of the story is that there's really nothing wrong with wearing flip-flops and leggings unless you happen to be wearing them after almost killing a cyclist and then calling that cyclist white trash when she's telling you that you almost killed her.

Also, before this happened I was going to tweet something more casual and lighthearted about the helmetless bike messenger dude I passed earlier on my trip who called out to me, "Better sit on your dress!" as if I don't know what to do with my legs and skirt and bike, as if I've never biked in a dress before or in the wind before or in a dress in the wind before. I don't need your gross advice.

So yeah, everyone out on the road tonight, specifically the two jokers from my stories above: Do better. NOT KILLING SOMEONE should not be a POINT OF PRIDE. NOT MEANING TO is not an excuse for ALMOST HITTING SOMEONE WITH YOUR CAR. There's a measure of responsibility at play in every single form of transportation, whether it's walking, biking, public transit, or driving. You are responsible for WHAT YOU DO, not what you very narrowly avoided.

EDIT: I also want to add that the driver who called me white trash was also white woman who clearly didn't have the time or the imagination to come up with a better, more specific insult for me.

((Originally posted on my Facebook.)) 

--

But speaking of advice, I did take a picture of this driver's license plate. Is this enough to file a report? Any suggestions? Thanks.

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Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Steve G on November 9, 2015 at 4:36pm

I agree that the emphasis on it being intentional is too strong, the wording on the site discourages one from posting if there is any doubt. Personally, I would wish the bar were lower and that there were separate categories. 

I just posted a video of me getting buzzed by an SUV in September, and it was accepted.  closecalldatabase.com/incident/detail/382

With enough posts it could become useful. 

Permalink Reply by Erin Vogel on November 12, 2015 at 8:16am

I'm glad that you submitted yours! It's nice to hear from someone who has actually submitted one. I totally agree; it won't work unless people use it regularly and know it exists as a resource.

Permalink Reply by Steve G on November 12, 2015 at 8:21am

yep. 

Here's the full report- the link I posted above went to the summary. 

http://closecalldatabase.com/incident/show-detail/382/

Permalink Reply by Erin Vogel on November 12, 2015 at 8:12am

I was wondering about what happened with your Close Call Database! I was so glad you had started that but I understand it must have been a lot of work. I appreciate what you said about close calls and I agree. Not documenting close calls feels like it just adds to the idea a lot of drivers have that they can intimidate cyclists & pedestrians with their cars without any consequence. I do know from my work at the Active Trans crash hotline that police are legally obligated to take a report, I just have to be relentless about it -- to be honest, I haven't had the time to do so, but I will be submitting it to the Close call Database.

And I absolutely would be interested in turning this into a letter to the editor. The way I see it, I want to get this idea out there as much as possible that a "close call" that doesn't result in an injury or death is still extremely traumatic and often still in violation of our laws. Do you have any contacts you think I should go to first? I should know better from my work as a reporter but if you have some cycling specific media contacts - mine are a little outdated - that would be great. I'm pretty sure you have my email but let me know if you don't.

Permalink Reply by David Barish on November 6, 2015 at 5:39am

I really do not understand the value of reporting this. Given that given nobody was hurt the Police are not going to pursue it. So, what do you get?   I think you only feel better because the woman was nasty. Had she been apologetic or realized the near  miss or expressed a realization that  maybe she  learned something you may have felt better. No. She was [insert  your pejorative term here].  Thankfully, you were not hurt. You can pat yourself  on the back to  the extent  that you had the awareness to avoid the door without getting plowed over by traffic. Perhaps  there is a chance she went home and realized  she acted out in the heat of the moment but will now look in the mirror if only to avoid mixing with "white trash" again.  Of course, she  may remain in her cloud of oblivious hostility. Karma  will have a way of evening out the playing field. 

I say save the reports for  the times when there  is an injury or damage to  more  than the psyche. In those circumstances, it is ok to be insistent. In this case, I would move  on.

Also, the story has value.  You rode away with something you will use.

edit- I originally attributed a comment to Yasmeen that she did not make. I removed that. I think I saw the Y in Yai Danche's name and did not read carfully.

Permalink Reply by Mike Schwab on November 6, 2015 at 6:15am

When the driver DOES hit someone, we can pull all these close call reports to support their case.

Permalink Reply by Anne Alt on November 6, 2015 at 6:38am

Yes. 

Regarding the idea of filing a police report, if there was no injury and no property damage, it's very unlikely that they'll take a report.  The close call database is more appropriate for close calls.

Permalink Reply by Carter O'Brien on November 6, 2015 at 7:27am

Add my name to the chorus of those saying it would be helpful in the bigger picture if you reported this, even knowing that it likely isn't going to result in a direct arrest or fine.

It's like phoning in 911 calls - the more people who do it, the more the police take notice, because data speaks.

Permalink Reply by Steve G on November 7, 2015 at 5:06am

Yes, report it. Not reporting it because one feels its pointless promotes the status quo.  Reporting it gets it in the stats. 

Permalink Reply by Erin Vogel on November 7, 2015 at 10:00am

Hey everyone -- thanks for reading, & for all the helpful input. I agree that it's always important to report - & I know that even if they don't want to, police are legally obligated to take a report - for exactly the reason a lot of you have already said, because it creates a record to refer to in case this driver hurts someone in the future. Thanks to all. 

Permalink Reply by Carter O'Brien on November 12, 2015 at 8:24am

Thank you for sharing your story, I am thrilled to have learned about this Close Call Database!

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