Try as we might, gentlemen cyclists & velopunks will never be able to completely capture magic of the Golden Age of British Touring. One big reason is that The Colonies simply lack the range of shockingly rude place names that would provide pythonesque humor on our nostalgia tours. Sure, we have Intercourse, PA and Climax, CO. But these pale in comparison to such double entendres as Crotch Crescent in Oxford, Titty Ho in Northamptonshire, Wetwang in East Yorkshire, Slutshole Lane in Norfolk, and my personal favorite, Penistone in South Yorkshire ... it’s pronounced PENIS-tun.


In fact, the UK is so famous for these (and plenty more) that the venerable NYTimes saw fit to run a thoroughly enlightening article on them yesterday. I highly recommend you take a look.


They certainly bring to mind one of Ambrose Bierce's entries in The Devil's Dictionary:

FLAG, n. A colored rag borne above troops and hoisted on forts and ships. It appears to serve the same purpose as certain signs that one sees and vacant lots in London -- "Rubbish may be shot here."