Time: April 1, 2011 from 6pm to 9pm
Location: West Town Bikes/Ciclo Urbano
Street: 2459 W Division
City/Town: Chicago, IL
Website or Map: http://maps.google.com/maps?f…
Phone: 773-255-6347
Event Type: lies_lies_lies, bikewinter
Organized By: Lee Diamond
Latest Activity: Apr 1, 2011
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I try to make my tours fun and entertaining, but also informative and factual. They are fashioned as a social event, but they are also like a rolling history lesson. Once a year, I need a break from all of the facts and I will just lie my……head off. This is that day. Anything…potentially everything I say may be suspect. The route itself is a bit of a joke and the biggest April Fool’s Day joke might be….is there a ride at all?
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Just to clear it up. It is $10,000 per spoke, not $100,000 a ride. Disc wheels count as a million spokes so don't try it smart guy.
Minimum bike value is $4 million. Bike must weigh NEGATIVE five kilograms or less. And have schrader valves. You may not inflate the tires.
Ride speed will be one hundred miles per hour.
We will obey all traffic signals and laws without fail.
We will all be required to carry our weight in cargo.
No cargo carriers.
The tour route is not published or available for preview but it is around 900 miles. It will take 9 hours. See above.
Children are permitted, but do not count towards cargo weight, but against it. If parent is pedaling, it must have cargo equal to the weight of the parent AND the child. Obviously.
No pictures aloud.
No talking above a whisper at any point except during one block on a very quiet residential street at which point you are required to scream. No more than three breaths are aloud on this block. We need a lot of screaming.
Ride is capped at 100,000,000,000 riders. Period.
Exclamation point.
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