...and for that alone you deserve to buy yourself some new stuff, but you probably haven't bought anything other than that Sriracha themed water bottle that you wanted oh, so bad.
But do you know where Sriracha is made? California. And if there's one thing I know about California is that it's not Chicago.
You deserve a Chicago water bottle. A Malört Water Bottle. A bottle based on a liquor produced in Florida.
As Chicago as a 34 degree May day with a windchill of 10. More Chicago than 1996 Phil Jackson doing a footwork battle against Oprah Winfrey in front of NBC's window on State St.
Get yours here - http://malortwaterbottles.bigcartel.com/ - unless you hate Chicago.
Or don't, but do tell your friends - we've only got a few left.