Hello. You, male biker on a road bike with Brooks saddle and pannier, and I got into an argument this morning. I want to explain my behavior and apologize. I did hear your bell behind me. I also just had passed a car leaving a parking space. I didn’t know what your bell indicated. I ring my bell for lots of reasons: to give a “heads up” to pedestrians; to alert a driver with a car door open; and to bring a smile to a child’s face. Even though I had ear buds in - awaiting a call from a surgeon - I heard your bell. I just didn’t know what it meant. When you passed, I was surprised and - likely curtly - asked for an “on your left”. You stated that you rang your bell and that was enough. I was taken aback - first by fear of hitting another biker and secondly by your angry response. I also noted your anger with my ear buds - likely not directed just at me. 

The stop sign approached. I know that I didn’t have the right of way, but I made a judgment call. Stop at a stop sign where an angry male was awaiting me or go through the stop out of turn. I went. I was shaking from our exchange at Lake. You approached me again, yelling at my biking. I turned onto Washington and did what I always do - follow traffic laws the rest of the way. 

I am am fully accountable for my choices and behavior. I’m sorry that I yelled cursory language at you as you biked off down Clinton. I also am sorry to the drivers of cars and others. I am embarrassed. I value everyone’s lives and safety. I violated my own values. It’s hard to sit with. 

But I ask you to consider this: As a woman biker in Chicago - 25 years and counting - I am used to being harassed by male pedestrians, drivers and bikers alike. I arrive to work scared about once every three weeks and it has nothing to do with my biking. I call my husband crying, and he listens. I take a few days off, walking to work, and then try again. 

Im not saying that you were going to harm me. It’s just scary out there, and I wanted to offer another perspective.