I try not to give lots of time and space to people that hide behind a computer to say unfortunate things to a fellow Chainlinker about them, their dog, their mother, etc. I have deleted comments when I felt it has gone too far and/or crossed the line into recommending illegal and/or violent behavior. I do this privately, quietly. This morning, I read this article and I wanted to share it with everyone on CL - those that have been on the receiving end of the name-calling and those that maybe got a little too heated when they felt super strongly about a topic.
I recently surveyed women on how they feel about Chainlink and there were a number of comments by women wishing they could feel more comfortable and welcome to make comments. We are doing our best to make that happen and I welcome everyone that hesitated to post to come back and give it another try. There is a group of excellent, attentive moderators that have your back and lots of us look forward to Chainlinking with you about bikes, riding bikes, fixing bikes, buying more bikes, etc.
If you do happen to get mad or disagree with a fellow Chainlinker, I ask this of you - when you are typing a response, take a step back and ask yourself if this is something you could say to that person over a beer (or coffee) at one of our Chainlink Bar Nights? Really, truly, look them in the eye and say it? I don't think you would. You mean well but maybe sometimes passion gets the best of you. Our Bar Nights have been fun, very friendly and a great atmosphere so I know we have a great group of people here. And we all love bikes. I really look forward to seeing everyone at these events.
If you do hide behind that computer, come out from behind it, come to a Bar Night or a ride and see what it's all about. Last month I talked with the guys from Bikes N' Roses and it put it all in perspective for me - this is why I decided to buy Chainlink. Oscar and his team are awesome and I want to be a part of that. And I want to help those that are looking for where to fix their bike, how to start racing, looking for a pub ride, etc. It makes me want to get up in the morning. I hope riding your bike makes you feel the same way it makes me feel. Bikes are awesome.
So I'm sharing this article that made me think about all of this... This article (see link below) is from the perspective of an accomplished, world-class athlete who has strangers hide behind their computer and send her hateful posts. Ridiculous, isn't it? Like so many of you, I choose to potate. And ride my bike. On that note, let's all try to be a little kinder to those of opposing views. Just try to imagine what your response would be if you were looking at their smiling face at a CL event/ride.
Thanks David, well said. :-)
We'll need to do something about that ratio. #goodtobeawoman ;-)
Driving brings this kind of behavior out of people as well.
Imagine if people pushed shopping carts around a grocery store in the same manner in which many drive. Cutting people off in checkout line, giving the finger, or running full speed down the aisle! Many people won't do in a grocery store or shopping mall what they are willing to do when in their cars.
Have you been to the Roscoe village Mariano's on a Saturday? Its a competition!
Ha good point!
Rich, you're not the only one to have wondered that!
Oh #$%&!!, I just deleted my comment by accident. I meant to edit it as I had put "my" instead of "may". Sorry about that. The upshot is that I dictate angry and send sober. It allows me to cool down while I wait for a letter to be transcribed. We don't have a chance to do that with digital communication and it may be best to let your post sit and do something else. When you come back you can figure out whether you still want to send or whether it is a better idea to edit. Of course, when you are editing don't be a fumble fingers like me and just delete the whole thing. :-) Of course, if you were about to say something really nasty maybe a delete isn't such a bad idea. :-)
David Barish's suggestion is a good one. If you take some time to sit on your expression before sharing it you nearly always find that there is either a great deal that ends up not needing to be said, or a better way to ssay it. Enough time at this makes you better at being constructive/helpful/whatever right out of the gate. And if you are a man and thinking something along the lines of, "what's the big deal??", consider that the experience of women on the internet is often wildly different from, and on the whole significantly more negative than, your own. It is one of those situations where being male is a privilege that most men are not aware of.
Women are +STRONG+CAPABLE+EQUAL except on the internet where they must be protected from hurtful words. #YesAllWomen